It was so nice to go to church this week. It has been a while and it was nice to be with our family together. Emery did really well. She loved the organ and singing. She really likes music and sings all the time. We love listening to her songs during the day.
So there was a talk today in church that was really meaningful to me. I haven't been to worried about Emery's heart too much. I know what the options are. I know what we are hoping for. I know the best and worst case scenarios. I know the likely plan of treatments. We did all of the research and education we could so we are not going into her medical needs blind. But I don't really try to dwell or think about it much. For one thing, Emery is doing phenomenally well. I have to remind myself that she has not been a part of our family forever. She fits in so well and has transitioned so easily that I am in awe of the way this adoption has worked out. I know that it is still in the early, possibly honeymoon, phase, but she is truly a sweetheart. Every now and then, especially when scheduling doctors appointments and flights, I think about the seriousness of her heart condition and the possibility that we won't have her with us for long, but I don't go down that road of thought often.
The speaker talked about the fact that we shouldn't ask God how long a certain trial will last, or to get us through it quickly or ask why us. But instead, ask what we are supposed to learn from it and how it can make us better. I found it really comforting. The idea that it is ok for me not to worry about Emery's heart. I don't need to be concerned with any of that, but to treasure each day and be glad for the journey. Also in the talk was that no one dies early except those who are unprepared to meet God.
I don't mean to be morbid. Emery is doing really well in every way. And I am grateful that she is. We are looking forward to all of the great things our family is going to get to do together. And I am grateful for the days that we are given and the people we are able to spend those days with.
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