One of the songs that my kids sing says 'Faith is like a little seed, if planted it will grow'. I think this is so very apparent when you get down the road and look back and instead of this small seed you have something strong and precious and meaningful. Even though my life doesn't always reflect my faith in the way I would like, I get busy and sometimes my days seem like a string of appointments and chauffeuring children to activities, and cooking and cleaning and just the everyday things that can make up our lives and none of them are major or super impactful on the world, I can see the way that my faith colors my life. It was a little seed that I planted when I was very young and now it is a rock that I am built upon. It is a source of comfort, a well of strength I can draw from. I am interested in what this new season of life will/may bring. I had cut back on most activities for myself before we adopted Emery, but I am going to be cutting back more and keeping her home more until her health is taken care of. I have been able to be more involved in the community and have so loved it but now I get to take a step back or maybe to the side or in a different direction and refocus on solidifying my family and I am really excited about it.
What a gift to be able to focus my energy on strengthening our family bonds and solidifying us as a unit. Societies and communities are only as strong as the families that make them up and I am thrilled to be able to really focus my time solely on my family for a while. I had a thought the other night, that the world is kind of like a huge storm right now and I need to strengthen my family against any storms that might come at us. We live a pretty peaceful life. We are very blessed in our daily lives, but I know on many fronts there is potential to do better and to be stronger and I am really glad that this adoption gives me the added incentive to focus on things that I haven't since my boys were younger since we have kind of moved on. We don't focus on the extreme basics of what our beliefs are, but with Emery we have to since it is completely foreign to her. We haven't done as many crafts or basic little songs or games since my older three were much younger, and now we do again and surprisingly they are all enjoying it. While there is always a focus on our family and I love my family, in the past years as our kids have gotten a little bit older, we are more and more busy and have more and more distraction that gets more of our focus and even though everyone is still involved in activities of their own my refocus is a really great thing. Learning the basics of what I have faith in has been fun for the older boys, I am loving hearing about their own faith.
I remember seeing a lesson when I was younger, there was a jar and a pile of rocks and a cup of sand. The teacher poured the sand into the jar then tried to fit the rocks in, they wouldn't fit. Then she put the rocks in first and allowed the sand to fill up the space around them and everything fit. I am getting the rocks of the most important things on my schedule and then letting whatever else can fit make it, or be left out for this season and at least I will be assure that I have the important things taken care of.
On the medical front, we spent a nice long day on Thursday going back and forth to the hospital and clinic for a pediatrician check up, blood work, and more blood work. By the end Emery, who is a total trooper, was pretty much done. And I realized that spending five or six hours dealing with medical issues that I thought would be 45 minutes can really impact a schedule:) I have been assured by the cardiologist's nurse that I will hear a surgery plan tomorrow afternoon. I am hoping that will be the case. Emery is doing really well, we just keep taking two steps forward and one step back with the attachment and bonding and adjustment process which is great since we are definitely moving forward!
We went shooting as a family yesterday and Emery loved it! Too bad she isn't old enough for a bb gun of her own, that is usually an 8 year old thing around here, but she has three older brothers and a dad who can share.
Thank you so much for your prayers. I know God lives. I know He loves us. I know He hears our prayers, every single one.